Chaos

Smiles on the outside, chaos in my mind. Taking up hobbies and trying to do more. Laughing at your jokes, holding you close. It makes me feel warm. You make me complete. Do you still feel it too? ... 

I know something isn't right but you won't say. You are so strong, you can take on the world. But if you need a hand to hold it's okay to ask. 

I can see it in your eyes but you won't say it. You might have the same feeling but won't admit it. It's this feeling that I haven't felt for a while, it's kind of coming back now and I don't know why ... Invisible and not very useful. Trying so hard, doing everything I can but it doesn't seem to be noticed. Putting everything in and hoping for the best. 

I just want you to know I'm sorry just know that you are not alone. Things change and people change, it's inevitable. Change is scary, yes but here's a thought .... will you change with me? Or will it be too much? Are you going to let me in or push me out? 

Oh, you won't let me in? Well, guess what? I'm still here because I'm not going anywhere. I'm here to stay. 

Like it or not. I'll be waiting right here where you left me. Hoping to see you again. 

“Holding on to hope when everything is dark, is the greatest test of faith.” -  Yasmin Mogahed

P.S don't forget to share the posts if you like them, comment and if you want you can follow me on Twitter @ShaZia132 because I tweet when I have a new post, subscribe to email notifications, don't forget to share it on all social platforms using the little icons at the bottom because it helps spread the message, but most importantly ...

Remember that YOU are in charge of how YOU feel.

Thank you for reading and have an amazing day!

xoxo ♡

Forgotten

Hi Scribblerz. 

Yes, it's been more than a year. I'm sorry for neglecting this blog. Life has been really, really crazy. 

I'm sure you've heard of a mid-life crisis ... but is it possible to go through one at only 26? 

 Let's do a quick recap before I get to my mid-life crisis. 

 I got married! It's been a whole year that I'm married (I have no idea how that is possible). COVID took over the world. This pandemic has changed so many things and has made me think about so many things that I just take for granted. 

 Now that we are all caught up, let's get to my "mid-life" crisis. I have no idea what I want to do in the future, I am so confused about my career and I can feel myself cutting people off again (some good and some not so good). I've made some new friends (believe it or not), they are amazing people and really help me through the difficult days. My mornings are good but as the day goes by I can feel my brain starting to bubble. If you picture a fizzy drink that you start shaking... the pressure builds and builds and before you can help it the top pops off and everything gets messed. My days go by so quickly yet it feels like it's dragging and everything I do feels like it's of no use anymore. Is it really making a difference? Does it really matter? 

 I think I might need a change ... but I don't know if I'm ready for one. I will need to check in again and let you know about that. For now, here's my parting quote. 

 "Sometimes I'm the mess. Sometimes I'm the broom. On the hardest days, I have to be both" - Rudy Francisco

P.S don't forget to share the posts if you like them, comment and if you want you can follow me on Twitter @ShaZia132 because I tweet when I have a new post, subscribe to email notifications, don't forget to share it on all social platforms using the little icons at the bottom because it helps spread the message, but most importantly ...

Remember that YOU are in charge of how YOU feel.

Thank you for reading and have an amazing day!

xoxo ♡

Tawakkul

Hi Scribblerz!

The last time I wrote I was in a happy place, this time I'm writing because I need a happy place, a place to put everything, so i can physically see everything that is happening around me.

I'm one person with one mind and what feels like a million people relying on me to either be there for them, hold their hand, be their shoulder to cry one or just to simply smile and have a coffee with them.

I'm not sure how some people do it but I don't sleep at night anymore, I feel like slowly I am failing everyone and everything i do is wrong or pushing myself deeper in to what seem like a black hole that is sucking the life out of me so slowly that i will only realize it when it's too late.

I try to take deep breathes and prioritise things but clearly its not working because I'm currently drowning, gasping for air and engulfing more water.

I look to Allah to help me and have so much faith that He will help but my sabr is running thin, I'm being tested for so very long that it now feels like I'm bring punished for what ever wrong i have ever done.

At least there are a few positives from all this, one is knowing I'm being punished in this world so I will have all the riches in the next and the other is this post, i finally wrote something after so long, so yay me.

Today i wont leave with a quote but rather a word, a simple 8 letter word ...  "Tawakkul"

P.S don't forget to share the posts if you like them, comment and if you want you can follow me on Twitter @ziakinz123 because I tweet when I have a new post, subscribe to email notifications, don't forget to share it on all social platforms using the little icons at the bottom because it helps spread the message, but most importantly ...

Remember that YOU are in charge of how YOU feel.

Thank you for reading and have an amazing day!

xoxo ♡

Be a Light

Hi Scribblerz!

It's been a while since I've written something here but today I feel like i need to write something because i need to share this with the world and also get it off my mind

Everyone at some time in their life feels like they can't do it anymore or they should just give up but its in this moments that you need to just take a deep breath, a step back and look around, look at the amazing people around you, every single person is like a candle that wants to help put light back into your life and take the darkness away ...

This amazing people around you are very important in life and if you have them, keep them close and don't ever loose them because a loss like that is worth millions and something no body can afford ... I'm very lucky to have such amazing people who are willing to listen to me, lend me a hug and give me advise on what to do ... i just want you all to know i truly appreciate you and everything you do, from the little words that you say, the 2 minutes you give me to rant and the 5 minute long hug that could last a lifetime... you people mean the world to me and i would never be the person I am without you.

"Be the light that helps others see" - Unknown

P.S don't forget to share the posts if you like them, comment and if you want you can follow me on Twitter @ziakinz123 because I tweet when I have a new post also follow me on goggle+ for blog updates, subscribe to email notifications, don't forget to click the little +1 button at the end because it helps spread the message, but most importantly ...

Remember that YOU are in charge of how YOU feel.

Thank you for reading and have an amazing day!

xoxo ♡

Fighting The Darkness

Hi Scribblerz!! 

It's been forever since I've posted anything but today I felt like I needed to give you an update. 

Life has been super busy recently and I haven't had time to just sit back, think and appreciate all the amazing thing's that has happened and remember that bad days are just part of the journey. 

Sooo a little bit of darkness got in ( I think I switched to default mode). I've been staying in the light for a while now but you cant get away from something that's been a norm for you for so long ... Yes, things are perfect at the moment but I still feel the need to look for something that might go wrong, something that might happen. Don't get me wrong, I've tried to change my mind set but it's difficult sometimes because that mind set and perspective is all I've know. 

A lot of the time people don't realise that happiness is an every day job for people like me, we need to remind ourselves every single day that it's okay to be happy and it's normal to smile all the time and that you don't have to constantly wait for something to go wrong because believe it or not everyone deserves to smile.

"Happiness is not a goal; it is a by-product" - Eleanor Roosevelt 

P.S don't forget to share the posts if you like them, comment and if you want you can follow me on Twitter @ziakinz123 because I tweet when I have a new post also follow me on goggle+ for blog updates, you can follow me on Tumblr also at bubblingwonderland or subscribe to email notifications, don't forget to click the little +1 button at the end because it helps spread the message, but most importantly ...

Remember that YOU are in charge of how you feel. 

Thank you for reading and have an amazing day!

xoxo ♡

Peace On Earth

Hi Scribblers!

Okay so first of all yes I know today is the 25th and my post is super late but I'm really sorry because I've been busy with university exams and it's also Ramadan  (the month that all Muslims fast and to all my Muslim reader I hope you are having a blessed Ramadan), which actually brings me to my second topic, Muslims. Yes I am a Muslim and no I don't hate or have anything against lesbian, bi sexual, gay or transgender people, yes I'm talking about the horrible event that happen in Orlando. I may be late to talk about the topic but I would still like to send my love and condolences to everyone who's friend,  family or loved ones were hurt or killed in the disturbing act of hate, may they all RIP.

This brings me to this month's topic which is peace. I believe that peace begins with a smile, if I smile at you and you start smiling at someone else this smile will be spread worldwide, because smiles are not only contagious (trust me you should try it) but they can also change the way you feel without alot of effort.

Peace between mankind should come naturally to all of us but in the world we live in there's so much hate, crime and murder that being nice to someone seems so odd or strange. So why don't we try something? If everyone who reads this post sends a positive tweet out to someone or anyone they know or even just smile at a stranger you'll be making a small difference in the world and who knows it might cause a ripple effect because if we don't spread love, peace and happiness then who will??

"Peace begins with a smile" - Mother Teresa

P.S don't forget to share the posts if you like them, comment and if you want you can follow me on Twitter @ziakinz123 because I tweet when I have a new post also follow me on goggle+ for blog updates or subscribe to email notifications, you can also follow the blog now and get notifications there, also don't forget to click the little +1 button at the end but most importantly remember that YOU are in charge of how you feel. Thank you for reading and have an amazing day!

xoxo ♡

Heartbreak

Heartbreak, something we all know, felt or heard about. Heartbreak, that terrible lost feeling you get when you realise it's over. Heartbreak, the painful feeling you get in your chest and everything turns grey and gloomy (although gloomy weather is my favourite).

Your first heartbreak is something you can't forget, you're so young, naive and innocent. You get all dramatic, playing sad love songs, dressing emo in black and you feel like the world is coming to a stand still. You do silly things like cut your hair because he said "I like your long hair" or you start wearing hoodies and swag pants because he liked that you dressed girly.

After a while things get better and you stop being depressed (eating 2 McFlurry's , a slab of chocolate and binge watching Dear John everyday) and suddenly you see that it does get better. You realise that you can still go on with life.

One day you walking in the mall and someone catches your eye, you feel the butterflies in your stomach and that feeling comes back, when you realise "Oh no, there we go again"

I guess what I'm trying to say is that no matter how hard times are, you always find a way to get through it and in the end you learn something out of it. I believe that everything happens for a reason and all the heartache, hardship and worries only make you stronger.

So to anyone out there that's going through a difficult time just stay strong, smile and be positive because before you know it everything will be better.

"Cry. Forgive. Learn. Move on. Let your tears water the seeds of your future happiness" - Steve Maraboli.

P.S don't forget to share the posts if you like them, comment and if you want you can follow me on Twitter @ziakinz123 because I tweet when I have a new post also follow me on goggle+ for blog updates or subscribe to email notifications and don't forget to click the little +1 button at the end. Thank you for reading!

xoxo ♡