The last time I wrote I was in a happy place, this time I'm writing because I need a happy place, a place to put everything, so i can physically see everything that is happening around me.
I'm one person with one mind and what feels like a million people relying on me to either be there for them, hold their hand, be their shoulder to cry one or just to simply smile and have a coffee with them.
I'm not sure how some people do it but I don't sleep at night anymore, I feel like slowly I am failing everyone and everything i do is wrong or pushing myself deeper in to what seem like a black hole that is sucking the life out of me so slowly that i will only realize it when it's too late.
I try to take deep breathes and prioritise things but clearly its not working because I'm currently drowning, gasping for air and engulfing more water.
I look to Allah to help me and have so much faith that He will help but my sabr is running thin, I'm being tested for so very long that it now feels like I'm bring punished for what ever wrong i have ever done.
At least there are a few positives from all this, one is knowing I'm being punished in this world so I will have all the riches in the next and the other is this post, i finally wrote something after so long, so yay me.
Today i wont leave with a quote but rather a word, a simple 8 letter word ... "Tawakkul"
P.S don't forget to share the posts if you like them, comment and if you want you can follow me on Twitter @ziakinz123 because I tweet when I have a new post, subscribe to email notifications, don't forget to share it on all social platforms using the little icons at the bottom because it helps spread the message, but most importantly ...
Remember that YOU are in charge of how YOU feel.
Thank you for reading and have an amazing day!
xoxo ♡
